Cassanova Journal #17 - Rejected , Again & Again .

I am a 16 year old boy, and I have given

so much time of my life trying to find a girl

to love, to  

hold, to care for and her to feel the same

 

way, but I am always being rejected. I've

had

thousands of conversations with girls, and I'm 


not shy, but I've lost all of my confidence after

being rejected every time. I've been told i'm 


handsome, caring, kind, even perfect.. But I  

never believe any of those words, because I 


always end up with a broken heart. whatever I

do I get rejected.

Cassanova Journal #16 - Missing You

First post 2011 . Yeah ... Awl thn suda ada mslah . My Dad Friend dead in car accident . Kesian . Menimang cucu pun belum sempat . Anyway , points is about me . Few days ago , aku prgi kat rmh Belle , melawat mak dan bapa nya . Family kami rapat . Tapi , yg mnyedihkan , Belle is gone , 6month ago . We couple for almost 3years . Tp break kejap . Then continue . Really missing her so much . Andai kata tuhan beri peluang .... Huh . Dh nama ajal nk leh watpa . No one can't rplace her . Tapi  kawan ku seorang ney ada iras2 muka & perangai Belle . Putih , Black-long hair , degil , ganas & periang . Mungkin ini sebabnya aku tertarik padanya . Hahhaha . Setiap kali ku rindu padanya , aku akan chat dgn kawan ku sorang ni dalam FB . haha . Cara dia berlawak pun hampir sama dgn Belle . She always made my day . Sejuk hati bila melihat dia . And kwan ku syok kat dia . So , ku lpaskan saja perasaan ku . Asal dia bahagia . Lihat mukanya sudah cukup bagi ku . I try to express my feeling towards her , but she didn't give me a chance . Just my luck . I try several times , she didn't see it . It okay , someday she will understand . Belle , wish you were here .....

Cassanova Journal #15 - Happiness

Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, 
today, and I'm going to be happy in it.  No pleasure is comparable to the standing upon the vantage-ground of truth. It is a great mitzvah to be happy always , really . huhu . 

The basic thing is that everyone wants happiness, no one wants suffering. And happiness mainly comes from our own attitude, rather than from external factors. If your own mental attitude is correct, even if you remain in a hostile atmosphere, you feel happy. 

Cassanova Journal #14 - Xcident

Semalam , hari palink mengerikan . My God ! Dh la keesokan harinya ambik result kuar ! Perkara yg tak disangka berlaku tiba2 berlaku . Takdir tuhankan , nk wat cmna . Smalam aku trlibat dlm xcident . YA ampun ! Bengong kepala ku ! Masing2 nk kluar dr simpang , Kebush ! Berlanggar la pulok ! Kemik kenari ku . Nsib bek ckit . Tp , KOS MAHAL ! ADOYAI !!!! Pening Kepalo Cmna nk cri duit . Tp , nsib bek ku dh claim . huhu . inilah pengalaman pertama ku xcident ! Pengajaran buat sang Cassanova . Hope tidak berulang lagi ! amin !

Cassanova Journal #13 - Breakdance . Guitar . Singing .

Ok , first of all , I love art since I was kid . Bakat pertama yg ku pelajari , main gitar . Bermulanya umurku 7 tahun , gitar menjadi girlfriend pertama ku . :)  . It was fun . Belajar dr abang , kawan and ofcoz , My daddy . Guitar is my best way to overcomed my brokenheart problem . Menenangkan . But , dlm bnyk2 jenis gitar , gitar Bass ku nang palink pro . haha . I think so .

Next , is singing . I'm a worse singer in my band . hahaha . When I sing , everybody laugh . hahaha . Humilated myself . But singing is the way to express ur feeling . For me la . Kesimpulannya , I'm not good in singing . :p

Breakdance ? It's been 3 years I'm not breakdancing . huhu . Last time I try , I almost break my hands . That was fortunate . Mula2 ku belajar dari kawan . Umur ku bruk 9 . So , mmg ku cepat belajar . Tp ku dh jerak . Takut tangan patah . I miss my talent !

 Rindu ku nk try breakdance gik . Tp apa boleh buat , ketakutan menyelubungi diriku . haha . Bak kata aku pun , " Fears is an illusion that created by our mind . But to face the reality , we need courage " . Tp ku xpat juak nk melawan rasa tkut ya . haha . So , followers ku , if you got talents , snap it and share it to me okay :)

Cassanova Journal #12 - Mimpi ?

Ok , let talk about mimpi . I’m realising my dream of owning a top football club. Some will doubt my motives, others will think I’m crazy . But sepa kesah ? >.<''   No person has the right to rain on my dream right ? Alasan terbaik untuk mengalami mimpi adalah di dalam mimpi ada alasan yang diperlukan. Dalam mimpi dan di dalam cinta tidak ada kemustahilan . Bak kata Steven Imbohourish , " To accomplish great things, we must not only act, but also dream; not only plan, but also believe " . So , KEEP DREAMING FELLAS :)

Cassanova Journal #11 - My Life Is A Misery

Today , I make my friend upset . I wrote a post on FB then she got mad . I didn't mean to do hurt her feeling . Before that , I"ve a fought with my STUPID EX ! JOHANA JOHAN ! . She Blame me everything ! Fucking HATE HER ! BECAUSE OF HER MY LIFE RUINS ! DAMNIT ! .... For My Friend , I just want you to know , I'm Sorry and I don't wanna LOSE you friend .